Heraklion’s taxi drivers have finally said the quiet part out loud: “We are tired of competing with Yannis-from-Koukaki driving his cousin’s Hyundai i20 like it is Uber Premium.”
According to the union, the situation has gone from annoying to biblical. Private cars posing as taxis — the infamous “piratika” taxis — are multiplying faster than WhatsApp conspiracy messages from your aunt.
In Heraklion, “pirate taxis” are so rare they should be considered protected wildlife. If one appears, locals should whisper,
“Shh… do not scare it… you will never see one again…”
Honestly, if a real pirate taxi showed up at the airport, three things would happen instantly:
- Ten taxi drivers would materialize out of thin air like Pokémon.
- Someone’s uncle would swear he “knew the guy from the army.”
- The vehicle itself would disappear before anyone could get its license plate — like a UFO sighting over Gouves.
The way the union talks, you would think there are fleets of pirate taxis patrolling Crete like it is the Fast & Furious franchise.
Reality?
Maybe one. Possibly two. Both shy. Both mythical.
Very much like rain in July — everyone talks about it, nobody actually sees it.
Everyone with a car and a questionable sense of entrepreneurship is suddenly offering airport transfers, sightseeing tours, weddings, baptisms, and, if the price is right, exorcisms.
Meanwhile, taxi income?
Flatlined.
Like the battery of an overworked Prius.
The Grand Motorized Parade of Fury
Next Tuesday, Heraklion taxi drivers will stage a motorcade protest, which is Cretan for: “We will drive slowly and angrily until someone listens.”
The parade begins at Heraklion Airport — naturally, the spiritual home of all tourist arguments — and will proceed to the Region of Crete headquarters, where the drivers will deliver their demands.
This slow-moving procession will likely be the safest moment in Cretan traffic all week.
The Drivers Are Done. Absolutely Done.
Their statement translates roughly as: “We are witnessing mockery without limits.”
In Cretan, that means: “We are one step away from flipping a car with our bare hands.”
They claim they are being driven to extinction by I.X. vehicles operating as under-the-table taxis. The lack of inspections?
Please.
They say inspections are so absent that even Bigfoot has been seen more often at the airport.
They want:
- Tax relief
- Economic support
- Fleet renewal
- A subsidy not only for electric taxis but also for hybrids and low-emission vehicles
- A government that does not pretend to be blind
Modest requests, really.
The Strike
During the 48-hour strike on December 2 and 3, taxis will not operate — except:
- Serious medical cases
- Certain student transport routes
- And possibly that one cousin who always “knows someone.”
The union says they will announce the next steps soon. Translation:
The horns are warming up.
Enter Symeon Ermeidis, Secretary of the Taxi Owners’ Association
Symeon has had it.
He declares: “We are reacting to the government’s inertia and indifference.”
This is extremely polite wording for what he wanted to say.
He reports:
- Theft of their work is skyrocketing
- The problem is island-wide
- Controls were insufficient
- Ministerial decisions did not help the inspectors
- Ministers need to stop “winking” at special interests
Baby, if ministers are winking, drivers are blinking in Morse code:
“SOS.”
The Three-Hour Rule
The law says I.X. rentals must be hired for at least three hours.
Three.
Hours.
Meanwhile, ads clearly show rides being priced per destination, like they are running a secret taxi menu.
Symeon’s summary: “If it quacks like a taxi and bills like a taxi, guess what — it is a taxi.”
And he wants the loopholes closed so everyone does the job they are licensed to do — not whatever they feel like after watching a YouTube tutorial on airport transfers.
Electric Vehicles: The Final Spark
Mandatory electrification in Athens and Thessaloniki on January 1?
Taxi drivers say: “Wonderful idea — see you in 2035.”
Because when your current car can barely handle the uphill traffic on Knossos, you are not ready for a Tesla life.
